You are an Ambassador of Love
It’s your choice if you want to be a good one.
Originally published at Medium.
We are all born beautiful babies. As infants, everyone seems to love us, and we seem to love everyone.
But when we become adults, we’re often often cynical or hateful toward the human race. Disagree with me on politics? You’re evil. Not as informed or interested in science or history as I think I am? You’re stupid. Have a different lifestyle from mine? You’re trash.
It’s easy to forget that other grown-ups were once beautiful babies themselves, who were loved by everyone and who innocently loved everyone.
How did they become so evil, stupid, or trashy?
Or, are they really evil, stupid, or trashy?
How did I become so quick to condemn others? Why did I stop loving everyone?
A few weeks ago I stumbled upon a free copy of the 2012 book Value Up by Mike Donahue with Matt Hamilton. It’s aimed at high schoolers, but I found it useful for my life today. It provides a valuable analogy.
A U.S. Ambassador to a foreign country represents the policies of the United States. Ambassadors don’t make policy based on their own opinions. If they do, they might cause trouble and will be fired.
Our Source (God, Creator, the Universe) says we are loved and have innate value, but we feel the feeling of being valued, of being loved, from “ambassadors,” or what the authors call “resources:” parents, siblings, extended family, neighbors, friends, teachers, and classmates.
Ironically, as we grow and are able to act with greater independence, we are more prone to feeling devalued. Parents or teachers may lose patience and say hurtful things in anger. Older siblings who adored us when we were babies want to re-assert the pecking order. Victims of abuse, feeling helpless and worthless at home, may lash out and become bullies in school.
When we feel that someone is tearing us down, we want to preserve our rank even if that means tearing someone else down. Self-worth no longer feels innate, but more like a competition. One result is extreme cruelty in the halls of middle schools and high schools and in social media. Join in on picking on someone so you won’t be picked on yourself.
Value Up intends to reverse these trends by fostering “self-respect, empathy, and dignity for all” in our youth.
These lessons also need to be learned by adults. We’re still tearing each other down. Too many of us still rely on others to be our “resources,” our gauge into our self-worth. That’s why, on social media, when we’re called names, it’s tempting to respond with even worse names. We’re still frightened little kids lashing out.
But one takeaway from Value Up is to remember that I am always an Ambassador of Love. And so are you. It’s an office we didn’t choose; it comes with being human.That’s one reason we are here: to love one another. I can be a good ambassador for love, and place love above my temporary anger. Or I can go “rogue” and treat others cruelly. Either way, they will internalize my message:
If I treat others kindly, they might think, “Wow, he sees value in me. Maybe he’s right.”
If I treat others cruelly, they might think, “Wow, that was cruel. What a jerk. But… maybe there’s some truth in the mean thing he said. Maybe he’s right.”
When others treat us cruelly, it’s best to remember they do it out of fear, out of their own lack of self-esteem. Responding in kind just demonstrates we are as fearful as they are.
Let’s remember that we have innate worth, no matter what others say. And then remember that they have innate worth too, and act accordingly.
James Leroy Wilson writes from Nebraska. Follow him on Facebook and Twitter. If you find value in his articles, your support through Paypal helps keep him going. Permission to reprint is granted with attribution. You may contact him for your writing, editing, and research needs: jamesleroywilson-at-gmail.com.